yg lalu biarlah berlalu

memank sungguh aneh bila aku tetap memikirkan dia. .
,,mungkin sekarank.uda waktu.na berlari tanpa kehadiran bayang.na . .
,,hidup memank berat . .
,,dan sangat berat bagi.ku bila harus melupakan mu . . .

aq g bisa melupakan mu.

amuwh adalah yg trindah yg pernah aq miliki. . .
,,dan bgtu melekat d hati.ku . . .
,,npa tega bgt ninggalin aq. . .
,,aq g bs lupain amuwh sblum amuwh bilank amuwh uda g CINTA aq lagi. . .
,,uda g btuh aq lgi. . .
,,bilank.o . .
,,yg keras d hadapan.ku . .

sehingga aq tau

mungkin ini memank pilhan mu. . . aq tak bisa berbuat apa2. . dan hnya bisa melihat senyumu yg menari d atas tawa mu . .. dan mungkin juga cinta mu yg sedang berdendang d atas bahagia mu. . . aq lebih bahagia bila melihat kau tersenyum lebar. . . dari pada melihat cinta ku yg hnya bertepuk sebelah tangan. . .. dan lebih menyakitkan lagi bila aq harus menjadi apa yg kau mau. . . tentang perasaan ku padamu tak lebih dari kasih sayang seorang ibu kpda anak.nya .. . tapi kau menganggap aq sbgai tempat dosa dan luka. . . tak seperti itu .. aq ingin kau anggap aq sebagai manusia yg tak bersayap yg hnya ingin memiliki mu sepenuh hati. . . tak lebih . . kau anggap aq sebagai apa yg aq ingin kan sudah cukup membuat aq bahagia. . namun semua hnya impian belaka. . dan sehingga aq tau. . . bahwa diri mu tak menginginkan aq untuk hidup d pikiranmu . .. .

sebenarnya..

sebenarnya aq g bisa idup tanpa mu. . . . sebenarnya cm amuwh yg ada d hati.ku .. . tapi knpa .. knapa kau lukai apa yg tlah jadi mimpi ku.. btapa kejih kau ludahi cinta ini .. . dan itu membuat ku jera. . . .

ini memank sulit ..

aq uda nyobak . .?!
tapi tetep g bisa. .
yapi kemauan mu sangat kuat. ..
aq g bisa berkutik lagi. . .
pkok amuwh senenk aq juga senenk. . .

my new life

ini mungkin adalah idup ku yg baru .. .

tanpa cinta tanpa ada kekasih . .

akan aku jalani idup tanpa cinta . .

mzki terkadang trasa sakit . .

y sudahlah. . .

kan ku jalani dg seksama .. .

masih tetap

angin ini masih tetap berhembus meski tiada yg peduli. .

airmata ini masih tetap menetes meski tidak ada yg menyentuh ..

darah ini masih tetap lah darah maski tiada yg tau dari mana ia berasal . .

dan hati ini masih tetap memiliki satu nama meski ia tak mengerti tentang kesungguh.an . .

hening tiada daya dalam lamunan yg tak bermata. .

aq masih dg kepalan tangan dg penuh cinta dan amarah . .

kok aneh ya..

npa c..

smenjak pertemuan itu amuwh jadi aneh..

kaget ya..

lead muka ku yg jelek..

emank aq jelek..

aq kan uda bilank..

aq thuw jelek..

huwmb..?!

klo tau gtu npa dlu mau jadi pacara ku...

skrank gni kan jadinya..

nyesel..

aq tau klo aq g bisa jadi cwok yg gantenk..

yg tajir..

yg bisa apapun..

aq cm manusia biasa..

yg jelek..

dompet pas2 an..

tapi aq pny CINTA YANG SEJATI..

tau gak..?!

aku thuw sangat mencintai mu. . .

ngerti.o talah. . ?!

aq ngrasa lek amuwh iku kyok g cinta nank aq..

trus aq ate yokpo...

mekso amuwh cinta nank aq..?!

cinta g iso d pekso..?!

Kenangan Terindah

wktu itu aq jalan2 ma pacarku .. .

oktavia .. .

itu adalah yg pertama kalinya aq ktmuan ma dia .. .

seneng bgt. . .

aq jadian ma dia pda tgl 27 mei 2011. . .

dan ktmuannya juga baru kemarin .. .

hihihi. . .

lucu skali. . .

Naungan Malam

aq sendiri melihat kebodohan ku yg tertawa terbahak . . .

dan hati ini tak henti - henti untuk meneriakan kata cinta .. .. . . .

ketika naungan malam sedang berdendank riank .. . .

aq tunggu

misteri memank sangat sulit d ungkap..
aq nasih blum tau apa yg ada d hati dari jiwa ku yg lain..
aq tergugah..
memank sungguh sulit d kira..
aq tak tahu..
alam pun juga tak tau..

Terdengar

sesuatu berlari..
namun tak henti ingin meluap..
aq melihat segenap rasa..
namun tak ada air mata d antara angin malam..
seraut wajah mulai bergandeng tangan..
dan tak henti aq memaksa diri..
bhawa hati ini adalah milik angin d bawah ufuk kebahagiaan..

mmuach..

LUUUUUWWWEEEEEEEEEEE

aku luwe . . .. . .

hhuhuhuhuhuhu . . .


guronk mangan . .

:(

JANCOK KABEH

PODO KOYOK TAEK
JAAANNCOOOK . .. ?!


aq jadi bosan dg idup ini . .
dg kerja.an ini.

Hening

Malam yg sepi . ..
malam yg kelam . .. .
malam yg gelap ..
malam yg hening . . .
malam yg pucat ..
tak ada daun ..
yg mampu bertanya mengapa .?!

sebuah

andai angin berganti debu..
sendung hati tak akan bergetar lagi..
aq dsni bukan untuk melihat..
tapi aq dsni hnya untuk merasa..
merasa apa yg pantas untuk aq rasa..
hati ini sudah berada d altar lain..
dan kekosongan ku tlah d isi oleh hati dari altar lain itu pula..

atas nama rasa aq brani brucap apa yg tlah terucap dari hati mu..

aq blum tau

apa c mau.ne . . . .. . . . .

aq ni d anggep apa  . .. .

aq uda g tau lagi apa mau.ne. . . . .

Disini

tentang kepercayaan . . ... . ..
sangat terlampau hilang bila terhembus angin . .

tentang rahasia . ..
hnya untaian sepi yg mampu melihat

tentang hati ... . . .
ini hati memank tlah menjadi satu dg yg hati mu . .. . .

tentang kesalahan .. .
knapa harus hitam, aq ingin melihat dunia mu . . .
secara menyeluruh . .

pergi

tak selamanya aq ada .. . . .. . . .

dan ini waktu yg tepat .. . . .

berdengung .. .

qta pernah berjalan d reruntuhan malam .. .
qta pernah bernyanyi d antara ombak dan pasir. .
qta pernah menangis d sela - sela dedaunan . .
dan qta pernah tertawa d bawah naungan pelangi ..
namun qta tak pernah berduka d atas nisan abadi .
qta tak pernah melihat tinta merah menoreh luka d atas pasir ..
qta tak pernah berprasangka buruk dari sebuah kenangan . .
dan qta tak pernah menghisap peluh ketika mimpi mulai membunuh . .

apa dunia ini di antara hidup dan mati ..
apa mungkin dinding2 surga tlah roboh. .
dan apa mungkin duniawi mulai terperosok dalam kalbu ..

aq teringat tentank sebuah kalimat. . .
" surga masih ada depan mata "
dan kni aq tak melihat apa2 d depan kehidupan ku ..
yg terlihat hnya keterpurukan . .
yg terlihat hnya senandung yg egois ..
yg terlihat hnya inti sari dari neraka . .
dan yg hnya terlihat ,,
hnya sebuah kenangan manis yg pahit .. .

satu berbanding dua dg luka . .
aq kalah telak dari kediaman luka . .
aq membungkuk lesu d bawah naungan luka. .
aq berlinank peluh d injak oleh luka ..
dan aq terdiam terpaku d antara 2 hal . .
pedih dan luka . .

terkadang aq berfikir untuk melihat masa depan ku ..
namun segumpal nasihat tlah merobohkan ku ..
disini sendiri dan aq benci ..
andai angin mampu membawaku terbang ..
aq akan pergi jauh d ufuk nirwana . .

andai saja jeritan itu berhenti berdengung.  .
andai saja . .

Blogged with the Flock Browser

fix me

come on . .
just saying to me . .
dont liying to me . .
im to be a scared ..
ini ternyata keheningan . . .

untuk melihat kegigihan alam . .

aq berlari terhentak .. .

males bgt . . .

haduh . . .

aq kok kyk males buat kerja gni ya . . .. ?

napa sih . . .??
huft . .. .

Blogged with the Flock Browser

huuuft . ..

capek ngrasain idup kyk gnie . . . .
yg satu meronta - ronta untuk terbank jauh . .
namun hati ku entah dmn dan cemberut menggerutu untuk tetap tinggal . .
setelah sekian lama aq dan hati ku bergelut,,
kni hati ku luluh juga . .
dan ikut merasakan kepedihan jasad ku ini . .
yg merasa sndiri tiada pelukan . . .
dan dia berbisik . .
mari qta merangkak bersama . .
d alam lain . .

sungguh memilukan . .
hati dan jasad ku berdampingan dalam menjalani air mata . .

Alesana_-_Annabel

How does the dagger feel now when you're on the receiving end?
If this is what you call betrayal.
Then this is what I call revenge.

How could I be so blind?
I guess I fell in love too quickly...
But I'm fine.

Imagine where you'd be now if you only knew.
If you only knew
The one you love is the one who's killing you.
I trusted you too much.
I know now that I should have kept my eyes wide open.
The first time that we kissed.
I'll bury you for this.

Just say to me
that this time is the last time.
And I'll pretend that
somehow I know we'll be fine.

Years spent watching in silence as your illness spilled onto page.
Those were the last days I spent with you.
Before you left, before he came.

How could I be so blind?
I guess I fell in love too quickly...
But I'm fine.

Imagine where you'd be now if you only knew.
If you only knew
The one you love is the one who's killing you.
I trusted you too much.
I know now that I should have kept my eyes wide open.
The first time that we kissed.
I'll bury you for this.

Just say to me that
this time is the last time.
And I'll pretend that I'm fine.

Ohh is it my fault?
You fell into the illusion you've been living discretely.
Ohh Should I blame you in the end?
Did you ever think the sketches would take over completely?

Ohh is it my fault?
Ohh is it my fault?

Die!
Just die!
You are scum!
You are filth!
Choke on blood as your knife
ends the show!
Writhe in pain you thought
you'd never know!

I don't think they dig graves close enough to hell for the likes of you!
I don't think they dig graves close enough to hell for the likes of you!

I handed you a knife and my heart ohhh!
I handed you a knife and my heart ohhh!
And now the dream is over.
And now the dream is over.

I handed you a knife and my heart ohhh!
I handed you a knife and my heart ohhh!
And now the dream is over.
And now the dream is over.

How could I be so blind?
I guess I fell in love too quickly...
But I'm fine.

Imagine where you'd be now if you only knew.
If you only knew
The one you love is the one who's killing you.
I trusted you too much.
I know now that I should have kept my eyes wide open.
The first time that we kissed.
I'll bury you for this.

I handed you a knife and my heart ohhh!
I handed you a knife and my heart ohhh!
And now the dream is over.
And now the dream is over.

I handed you a knife and my heart ohhh!
I handed you a knife and my heart ohhh!
And now the dream is over.
And now the dream is over.

I handed you a knife and my heart ohhh!
I handed you a knife and my heart ohhh!
And now the dream is over.
And now the dream is over.

Alesana_-_To be scared by an owl

Look at the sky as the night descends
The rain is crashing down, I've hit another dead end
Just before I let hope slip away
A shadow is revealed, the devil shows his face

I'm scared to death and have myself to blame, I'm to blame
How did we end up fighting anyway?

You know, I used to search the sky and dream of where you were
I need you by my side, we can end this together
I know I promised you the world and still I let you down
I need you by my side and together we'll end this now

Look in my eyes! Am I shaking now?
I am all you fear, have I made myself clear?

Shut your mouth and finish what you've started
Boy, you haven't got the slightest idea
Just who I am and what I do for you
Don't you see that I am trying to save you?
Shut your mouth and finish what you've started

I'm scared to death and have myself to blame, no one else
How did we end up fighting anyway?

You know, I used to search the sky and dream of where you were
I need you by my side, we can end this together
I know I promised you the world and still I let you down
I need you by my side and together we'll end this now
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/a/alesana/to_be_scared_by_an_owl.html ]
As the last rays of sunlight fade, one killer chases another
Through the tangled madness of the city
A flash of steel announces the presence of his quarry
The stage is set, the night explodes...

You killed her you murderer
You have stripped me of the one that I love
Annabel, our Annabel
You have no clue what she's capable of...

I'm scared to death and have myself to blame
How did we end up fighting anyway?

You know, I used to search the sky and dream of where you were
I need you by my side, we can end this together
I know I promised you the world and still I let you down
I need you by my side and together we'll end this now

You'd better look behind you...

Her youthful flesh colour had drained from her much like the very blood from her veins on the bedroom she lied. Such a foul image for one to withhold. In some twisted way it only seemed to enhance her exquisite beauty, like a lily on a grave. I have failed. Once again I have let her down. My poor sweet Annabel. You trusted me, you gave me your love, your soul, now I fall to my knees in front of the man that took you from me. I fall pathetic, defeated. I will be with you again so soon my love, so very soon. Eyes of an angel await me, I'll be damned, nothing's going to stop me now.

Sweetheart, darling,
Turn around, it's me, follow my voice,
Everything's gonna be okay.
My love, everything will be fine,
It's all over now.

Alesana_-_In Her Tomb By The Sounding Sea

So I'm thinking we should maybe
just run away from here
with no plan of coming back.
we can stay away forever
our anguished love will be all we have and

i will save your life
its happening again,
its happening again
i wont watch you die
its happening again,
its happening again

i can see its not the first time
you have come and taken her from me
Rest assured it's not the last time,
I'm going to set you free.

you took her once
shame on you
oh
you took her twice
shame on me

whisper softly
and tell me that you love me
I'm losing you,
i dont know what to do
please forgive me
and know that i am sorry
I'm losing you,
i dont know what to do

Trapped inside a memory.
(save you)
im falling apart

do you realize its over
theres no chance of leaving here alive
You don't realize what you're saying,
without me you can't survive.

you took her once
shame on you
oh
you took her twice
shame on me

whisper softly
and tell me that you love me
I'm losing you,
i dont know what to do
please forgive me
and know that i am sorry
I'm losing you,
i dont know what to do

Trapped inside a memory,
(save you)
ive lost it all
im falling apart

you've ripped out my heart.
(im falling apart)
i dont know where to start

i dont want to go
its happening again,
its happening again
but i cant let it show
ill be with her again,
together to the end
if i have to go
its happening again,
its happening again
ill be damned if im alone
ill be with her again
together til the end.

whisper softly
and tell me that you love me
I'm losing you,
i dont know what to do
please forgive me
and know that i am sorry
I'm losing you,
i dont know what to do

Trapped inside a memory,
(save you)
im falling apart
ive lost it all

Alesana_-_The Lover

Is it her, could it be,
should my eyes believe
what they see

If you are who I think you are
I might lose my mind

Just a kiss, from her lips
and I would simply float away.
The way her hips
swing back and forth
I've got butterflies

Dead girls don't just appear
out of thin air
But I am victim
to her sinister stare.

Please don't hate me for
what I've done
Run away with me,
I'll be everything that you need
Such a pretty girl screams to me,
Take my hand, take my breath away
What if my heart breaks again?
take my breath away

Just the scent of her skin
Unlocks forbidden memories
The slightest graze of fragile hand
I've got butterflies

Dead girls don't just appear
out of thin air
But I am victim
to her sinister stare.

Please don't hate me for
what I've done
Run away with me,
I'll be everything that you need
Such a pretty girl screams to me,
Take my hand, take my breath away

I'll be your anchor, I'll be your lover
I'll be your anchor, I'll be your lover
And if your heart is filled with doubt
I'll bear my soul to you belle!

Please don't hate me for
what I've done
Run away with me,
I'll be everything that you need
Such a pretty girl screams to me,
Take my hand, take my breath away

I can't lose you again...
I can't lose you again...
I can't lose you again...
I'm nothing without you.
I'll never let you down
I'll never let you down
I'll never let you down
Angel

Alesana_-_Heavy hangs the albatross

I've made up my mind
and I will be leaving.
Leaving this cruel, dark world
for the soulless to share.
But first...

Women will shriek
and watch their husbands bleed.
Children will cry
and watch their mothers die.
Because tonight...
Tonight we all go to hell!
Why?

I have to let go
of what happened to my love.
I am taking out on everyone else
all the problems I've brought on myself.
When I made your heart melt.
My belle, we soon will meet again.

There's nothing left for me to lose except confusion.
I'm finished trying to tell myself this will go away.
There's no one left to talk me down.
My feet are slipping...

One day I hope my name
doesn't bring back memories.
Of the day that I left her.
Goodbye, so long.
My heart belongs to the one
I am chasing after.
For better, or even for worse, remember me forever...

Now the only question left is how
to take you all down with me.
The coroner will have his hands full tonight.
That is if he is not among the dead.

Dead will choke the streets
with such vulgarity that
grown men will weep.
And then you will find
the end is drawing night.

There's nothing left for me to lose except confusion.
I'm finished trying to tell myself this will go away.
There's no one left to talk me down.
My feet are slipping...

One day I hope my name
doesn't bring back memories.
Of the day that I left her.
Goodbye, so long.
My heart belongs to the one
I am chasing after.
For better, or even for worse, remember me forever...

The dizziness stuns me,
would someone please distract me?
Can I really get through this?
Can I really betray myself?

There's sweat on my hands
and a knife at my throat.
And as the blade bites my skin
Annabel appears...

One day I hope my name
doesn't bring back memories.
Of the day that I left her.
Goodbye, so long.
My heart belongs to the one
I am chasing after.
For better, or even for worse, remember me forever...

Alesana_-_The Thespian

Baby! why are you doing this to me?
Sweetheart! are those your eyes staring straight back at me?
Angel! I see your smile everywhere!
Darling! stop!

Night falls and Im running in circles wo OH oh!
Im being chased by my imagination wo oh oh!

Tell me Im forgiven say youll always be mine
Say that everything is over, tell me Im fine...
No one deserves to live like this!
*repeat*

I touch your lips and stare in your eyes
You smile and it makes me fly
You are the reason my heart beats
Tonight it's just you and me...

Night as dark as my thoughts
Sets the scene for my return
Lightning nips at my heels
As I race home
Wearily I stagger
Towards the song of her pale voice
Demons jeer my attempt
To be free

Tell me Im forgiven say youll always be mine
Say that everything is over, tell me Im fine...
No one deserves to live like this!
*repeat*


I touch your lips and stare in your eyes
You smile and it makes me fly
You are the reason my heart beats
Tonight its just you and me...

Windows cast her gentle reflection
Her somber silhouette dances for me

Look at you, you miserable fool!
Get off your knees, your prayers fall upon deaf ears
http://www.elyricsworld.com/the_thespian_lyrics_alesana.html
Gods turned his back on you, heavens gates are shut
And now youre knocking on the Devils door!

Ive been expecting you for some time, sir
Allow me to introduce myself
Im the one who pulls on all the strings, son
Youre lucky I dont kill you where you stand!
Dear God, it's her!

Tonight I raise my glass
This cant be real
For I know its time to move on a
My patience will not last
All hope has failed. Ive lost my soul.
Tomorrow I will be gone

Alesana_-_Hymn for the shameless

Saw your eyes today in a memory painted in the sky.
You smiled and said to me, "a love like this can never truly die."

So now the show's over and I've got to disguise the thing I've become.
I only wish I could stop laughing!
I grin because the joke is on them this time!
They don't have a clue.

Calm consumes me.

(I immerse myself in sick reflection...)
I shut my eyes and once again the pleasure strangles me.
I taste the tears of sweet indulgence, pain and fantasy.
Oh, the visions inside my head...
The emptiness will haunt you...

(I immerse myself in sick reflection...)
Sanity is slowly slipping from my hands now.
I'm standing closer to the edge than I should be allowed.
Oh, what little regret I have...
Does that make me a killer?

I am the face of death standing right behind you.
Yet you're oblivious to my cold breath on your neck.
Is it just too easy?
Am I just too good at this?
I am the chosen one.
I am the end of all and now you are mine!

Calm consumes me.

(I immerse myself in sick reflection...)
I shut my eyes and once again the pleasure strangles me.
I taste the tears of sweet indulgence, pain and fantasy.
Oh, the visions inside my head...

The emptiness will haunt you...

(I immerse myself in sick reflection...)
Sanity is slowly slipping from my hands now.
I'm standing closer to the edge than I should be allowed.
Oh, what little regret I have...
Does that make me a killer?

Saw your eyes today in a memory painted in the sky.
You smiled and said to me, "a love like this can never truly die."

Let's just say you're right and the nightmare ends, we wake up side by side.
What makes you think that I would let you live?
I've really lost my mind...

Behold, for I am the will of the reaper!
Beg for the mercy of your worthless angels!

As relief washes over me, calm consumes me.

(I immerse myself in sick reflection...)
I shut my eyes and once again the pleasure strangles me.
I taste the tears of sweet indulgence, pain and fantasy.
Oh, the visions inside my head...
The emptiness will haunt you...

(I immerse myself in sick reflection...)
Sanity is slowly slipping from my hands now.
I'm standing closer to the edge than I should be allowed.
Oh, what little regret I have...
Does that make me a killer?
[x3] [fades out]

Alesana_-_The Murderer

Is it about time?
Oh yes it is, it really is!
Let's get this party started!
My hands are shaking...
Just take a drink,
steady your nerves.
Let's get this party started!

Are you ready to run?
I've been waiting patiently for this...
Are you ready to run?
I've been waiting patiently for this...
Are you ready to run?
I've been waiting patiently for this...
Are You ready to Die?
Cause lately it seems I'm going insane!

Please don't get up!
Oh no, you're fine right there!
Just don't mind me as I take you all in!
So drink 'em up, oh yes just slam 'em down!
Have one on me as I lock you all in!
my little sheep your wolf has come...

You should know I'm dangerous.
My thirst for blood turns me on...
How sweet...

Is this what we pictured
the night that we said, "you're the one"?
I'm going crazy without you,
It's hard to believe but I'm having fun.

Annabel, look what you've started!

The knife slides down to the tip of my tongue.
I'm finding pleasure in watching you writhe.
I lean in just to lick the sweat off your face.
I taste the reverence dripping down my throat.

You should know I'm dangerous.
My thirst for blood turns me on...
How sweet...

Is this what we pictured
the night that we said, "you're the one"?
I'm going crazy without you,
It's hard to believe but I'm having fun.

Annabel, look what you've started!

Are you ready to run?
I've been waiting patiently for this...
Are you ready to run?
I've been waiting patiently for this...
Are you ready to run?
I've been waiting patiently for this...
Are You ready to Die?

There is definitely something wrong!
Will they scream?
Will they cry?
Will they beg as they die
or have to accept that this is the end?

Are you ready to die?
Are you ready to die?!
I'm so glad that all of you came!

Looking in I see a lonely man etching tallies into the bar.
Looking on I see a desperate man repeating something on the floor.

Oh how blood turns me on...
So sweet....

Alesana_-_A Lunatic's Lament

If only you could see
(If only you could see)
You're the only girl
I've ever dreamed of
If only you could see
(If only you could see)

Should I apologize
with such pathetic eyes
Just the sight of you has made me
sick tonight (tonight)
It was your poison kiss
that turned me into this
Then again there is a chance
you could be right.

Darling will you please (please)
take a walk with me
We could count the stars
and disappear
(I wish you could see)
I wish you could see
You're the only girl
I've ever dreamed of

Are you satisfied?
Are you satisfied?
Are you satisfied?

What fate has led me here?
Oh please forgive me dear.
I don't know if I could survive
on my own
I could have married you,
instead I buried you
Now we'll see
if I can fall asleep alone (alone)

Darling will you please (please)
take a walk with me
We can count the stars
and disappear
(I wish you could see)
I wish you could see
You're the only girl
I've ever dreamed of

Are you satisfied?
(Are you satisfied?)
The nightmare's coming true
Are you satisfied?
(Are you satisfied?)

Are you satisfied?
(Are you satisfied?)
I did it all for you.
Are you satisfied?
(Are you satisfied?)

I wish you could see
You're the only girl
I've ever dreamed of

Darling will you please (please)
take a walk with me
We can count the stars
and disappear
(I wish you could see)
I wish you could see
You're the only girl
I've ever dreamed of

Are you satisfied?
(Are you satisfied?)
Are you satisfied?
(Are you satisfied?)

The depth of a man's soul
can not be measured in a matter
of meters and fathoms
but rather it is in my opinion
only quantified by his proximity
to heaven and hell.

It was in such a state that
I ushered myself past
the town tavern,
bursting at the seams with
the sounds of laughter

and Had it only been a different night,
a different place, a different kind
of man passing by the threshold
of that innocent pub.
runken piano playing.

The events that transpired
at that point would have
undoubtedly been drastically different.

I can only guess if anyone outside that place
had a clue when the exclamations
of mirth became the desperate
screams of the helpless,
begging for their very lives.

Alesana_-_The Artist

What is wrong with her eyes?
A glossy stare that won't leave me be starts my blood running cold.
A gaze that could make hell freeze over...
I have to understand she's gone...
But she's not!
Don't you tell me that she is dead!
Watch her lips softly move because she's still whispering to me!
...And something here is not quite right...

Skin so cold beneath my touch as I brush back her hair and close her eyes.
But I cannot stand to turn away.
When I do, she'll be gone...
It's frightening...

Sweaty hands will fail to lock the door...
They'll be here soon.
I wish I could keep my teeth from grinding.
I wish I'd stop looking behind me.
Running now will only make it worse...
They'll be here soon.
I wish I could shake the awful feeling.
I wish my mind would stop...

Maybe I am crazy and my mind is trying to deceive me.
As the ground vanishes I wonder will the sky be the next to fail me?
Paint abandons canvas.
And my brush can't seem to start again from scratch.
As I watch everything unravel, why should I even try to stop the collapse?
I won't...

Shaking as I rest her body down.
No one knows, only me...
It's frightening...

Sweaty hands will fail to lock the door...
They'll be here soon.
I wish I could keep my teeth from grinding.
I wish I'd stop looking behind me.
Running now will only make it worse...
They'll be here soon.
I wish I could shake the awful feeling.
I wish my mind would stop...

Maybe I am crazy and my mind is trying to deceive me.
As the ground vanishes I wonder will the sky be the next to fail me?
Paint abandons canvas.
And my brush can't seem to start again from scratch.
As I watch everything unravel, why should I even try to stop the collapse?
Why should I even try to stop the collapse? Why should I even try?

There's a madman glaring straight at me!
Oh I know I've seen his face before...
I am sure I've seen his face before...

Maybe I am crazy and my mind is trying to deceive me.
As the ground vanishes I wonder will the sky be the next to fail me?
Paint abandons canvas.
And my brush can't seem to start again from scratch.
As I watch everything unravel, why should I even try to stop the collapse?
I won't...

Alesana_-_curse of the virgin canvas

I am here to tell you a story
a story that will torture your thoughts by day
and poison your dreams by night
and though i will do my best,
there are no words that can be written
nor brush strokes laid on canvas
that can describe this stark
and utter horror of the night that Annabel died

the emptiness will haunt you

this is a nightmare
is my Annabel really gone?
My eyes are stung by daylight,
i find it hard to breathe
her body teases me
as the sun reveals the dawn
The smell of bleed still crawls,
I kiss you softly goodbye.

baby lay in my arms
and cuddle me close
soon this will be
just an awful memory
(will i ever be able to sleep again?)

my angel lie to me
and tell me im dreaming
(please wake me up, please wake me)
A girl like you will always be
such a tragic part of me
(oh ecstacy you torture me).

i watch the blood drip
from the corners of your mouth
Your icy flesh is lying,
your pallid skin still glows.

im starting to belive
what my eyes are seeing now
You're still so beautiful
and yet so morbidly still.

baby lay in my arms
and cuddle me close
soon this will be
just an awful memory
(will i ever be able to sleep again?)

my angel lie to me
and tell me i'm dreaming
(please wake me up, please wake me)
A girl like you will always be
such a tragic part of me
(oh ecstacy you torture me).

Sweet revenge...
He will pay,
he will pay my dear.

empty eyes accuse
a face so evil
im comming undone
the mirror says it all
a crimison story
of innocence lost
empty eyes accuse
a face so evil
im comming undone

So terribly memory returns
of her struggle,
of her screams, of her.
Lord forgive me!
My stomache heaves
as I see the blood that covers me.
Blood that was once hers.
I'm a monster!

such an awful memory
(will i ever be able to sleep again?)

my angel lie to me
and tell me im dreaming
(please wake me up, please wake me)
A girl like you will always be
such a tragic part of me
(oh ecstacy you torture me).

Sweet revenge...
He will pay,
he will pay my dear.

a mirror never lies
they know, everybody knows
do you not see what they see?
a mirror never lies
i see what they see
everybody knows, everybody knows

hemmmmmmmmmmmmmbbbbbb .. .

d sna enak palink yo . . .
pasti enak . . .
jdi orank asink yg berada d likungan orank asing . .
g knal spa2 . . .
entah makan atau g . .
hahaha . . . ..
oh . .
bwa gitar aja . .
buad ngamen . .
wakakkakaka . .
jreng___jreng___jreng___
hoho . .<<kpan y bisa k sna . .?!

Ampuni aku ya Allah

apa c salah ku . .?
knapa hari kemarin ma skarank kok salah mlulu . . .?
apa aq.na yg goblok . .?
apa memank ini coba'an mu . . ?

y Allah . .. . .
aq uda g kuat lagi ma smua ini . . .
ambil lah nyawa ku . . .
aq sudah tak pnya apa2 lagi . .
aq uda g pnya tmpat untuk mencurahkan isi hati . .. .
AKU . . .
MEMANK . .. .
TERKUTUK . .. ?!

emane talah . . .

biyuh . . . ..
arek2 jaman saiki kq ayu2 yo . . .
eman.e talah . . ..
hahahaha. . . . .
oalah .. .
nduwe konco kq sambat ae . . .
hahahahaha. . . .
warnet mw bubar . ..
truzt aq mw kerja dmn . . .?!

fuck...

hey..
slma aq msih brnafas..
aq akan slalu mengingat mu..
ingat.lah kalau kau pny hutank pda ku..
haha....
y ampun...
nrima gaji g utuh..
kasian bgt..
hahahha.....

sendiri . . . .

knie aq bner2 sndiri . . .
uda tidak ada lagi yg perhatian ma aq . . .
uda g ada lagi yg sms2 aq . . .
npa . . .?
y uda lah . . ..
ini adalah kutukan . . . .
kalau aq memank d takdir.kan buat sndri . . . .
kni baru ku sadari . . .
bhwa aq bner2 butuh amuwh . . . . . . .
AKU BENAR - BENAR BUTUH KAMU . . . . . .

apa maksud semua ini . ?

apa sih mau kalian . ?
aq udah ancur kayak gni . .
trus npa kalian g mau ngerti aq . .
apa emank kalian muak ma aq . .
aq g ngerti ma sifat kalian . .
aq juga manusia . .
yg punya akal dan pikiran . .
npa juga klian nganggep aq sperti orang B.O.D.O.H . .?!
aq berlagak seperti orang B.O.D.O.H. .
supaya kalian suka ma aq . .
tpi . .
klian udah terlampau batas . . .
klian pkir aq orang yg TOLOL gtu.a . . ?
" iya " . .
bgtu kan yg ada d benak klian . .?!
haha...

aq tertawa sendiri melihat kebodohan ku..
entah kapan . .

aq g akan lagi ada d hadapan kalian . .?!

saat burung gagak tak bisa terbang bebas

ini adalah kebiasaan ku yg paling buruk...

mengingat apa yg tak pantas aq ingat...
y sudah lah...
aq coba buat berlalu..
tanpa kenangan..
dan mulai sekarang aq akan mencoba idup lebih baik..
meski terkadang..
aq merasa tidak lah pantas untuk idup....

bantu aq untuk melihat dunia..

this is my lonely

saat ni aq merasa lemah tak berdaya..
mungkin karena aq masih ingat ma masa lalu ku...
aq g bisa melupakan semua tentang masa lalu ku..
entah knpa,,
aq ingin sekali melihat masa lalu ku sekali lagi..
tapi semua thuw uda g mungkin..
biarlah aq idup dalam sepi ku.....